Why I can’t find a good yoga class in India to save my life. - The Expat Blog

Why I can’t find a good yoga class in India to save my life.

Melissa A. Bell - Monday, July 27, 2009 3:54 AM
On a previous blog post (sorry, I can’t hyperlink to it in here, it’s called “The Great Indian Novel”), readers recommended a slew of books I should read about India. Last month, I finally got to Gita Mehta’s Karma Cola, one of Aditya’s recommendations. It’s a fantastic glimpse at the spiritual expats of the 70s through the eyes of a world-weary Delhiite. While so many India books are written from the outside eye, this captured the funny, sad, chaotic, insipid moments of the great Hippie invasion of India from a local’s perspective.

One thing in particular Mehta wrote caught my eye: “The seduction lay in the chaos. They thought we were simple. We thought they were neon. They thought we were profound. We knew we were provincial. Everybody thought everybody else was ridiculously exotic and everybody got it wrong.”

Okay, so things have changed a bit since 1970, but despite the realization that India has much more to offer to the West than just gurus and the Ganges, this quote still rings true. So many people in West still get India totally wrong. (Myself completely included.)

A perfect case in point: the yoga experience.

Until about five years ago—when us Westerners started seeking financial salvation instead of spiritual salvation in India—the concept of the country came from what the hippies brought back to us: the Beatles and their sitar; Mia Farrow and her guru; burnt out, bleary-eyed men in New York’s East Village selling tiny bronze Ganeshas and OM shirts. But one of the greatest imports to the West was the lovely spiritual and physical experience of yoga.

Every gym in America offers it. Gwenyth Paltrow and Madonna account their svelte figures to it. After 9/11, the law firm I worked at (five blocks over from the Trade Center) offered employees the option of counseling or yoga. It’s hip. It’s healthy. It promises countenance of mind, bolstering of spirit, and sexy thighs. At least, that is, in the US it does.

You see, we Americans love to take foreign ideas and make them more convenient, more multi-tasking and much less spiritual. Go to any yoga class in the US and the teacher would probably escort you out of the class if you said it wasn’t a spiritual practice. But, aside from a couple of chants of OM at the end of the class and a quick Namaste, it’s an exercise class, pure and simple.

I love yoga. Well, I love the yoga in America. It’s fun, soothing, and even meditative in its way. But I go cause I want my gluts tight, not because I see it as a path toward spiritual enlightenment. My guess is most of the other people in the class feel the same way too. They may like to believe that it’s their soul that gets them to class, but I know it’s their waistlines.

But they’ll never admit it. To them, yoga—and by default India—is still a mystical religious experience. When I go to a class in the US it’s always awkward when the topic of where I live comes up. My sister announces: “She lives in INDIA” to a full class of rapturous-looking, spandex-clad students. “India? Really! Who do you practice with? I’m so jealous. I’m planning a trip soon. I really want to get deeper in to my practice.”

And the class starts and I can feel everyone’s eyes on me: “What amazing Indian style yoga will she do?”

The problem is I suck at yoga. Really suck. I can hardly do a push-up, let alone a series of sun salutations. Why? Because I haven’t practiced yoga since I moved to India three years ago.

Yoga in India is not yoga in America. Yoga in India is a religious practice. With rituals and the idea of eternity behind it. Teachers here assume this will be a lifelong study and you’re in it to slowly, brick by brick, learn the ancient techniques. That is wonderful. That is sublime. That is not for me.

Listen, I wish I were more spiritually focused and I wish I put more time in to the pursuit of the loftier life ambitions. But, you know what? I don’t. I love India’s rich, beautiful, incredibly deep religious grounding. But I don’t live there to pursue religious awaking. And neither do 98% of my Indian friends in Delhi. They are living their lives, loving the wrong people sometimes, stressing about work, and fighting with their parents just like every young, urban kid everywhere in the world. They are not walking around in some exalted yogic state.

India has its spiritual side, but it isn’t all wandering sadhus and levitating yogis. Gita Mehta knew that 40 years ago. We in the West are still figuring that out.

So, to my yoga class in San Diego: No, I can’t do the bended crow backwards headstand. Sorry guys.

Share this post: email it! | del.icio.us! | digg it! | newsVine!
Tagged in: , , , , , , ,
34 Comment

From RDX

July 28, 2009 3:32 PM
You brought the secret out in the open. The spiritual tourism is going to get hit because of your blog, which is not the best thing to happen in this recession. Overall very interesting blog!!!

From Melissa A. Bell

July 28, 2009 9:52 PM
Haha! Sadly, @RDX, don't think I have much influence, especially over determined spiritual seekers. But glad you like the blog!

From simran

August 1, 2009 7:02 AM
Whether you can yoga or not, clearly you know how to try and sell blog postings...tagging "sexy thighs" indeed.

From Melissa A. Bell

August 1, 2009 8:52 AM
@Simran, I should know this as a highly experienced multimedia journalist, but I actually have no idea how the tag thing works. Is that how you found this?? And through what? Googling 'sexy thighs'? This Internet thing-a-ma-jig never ceases to amaze me.

From JS

August 2, 2009 7:39 PM
@Simran: You sure are smart and right with the point you made - but isn't that how Americans (and indeed all of the west) sells their products? By exoticising, repackaging, refurbishing, you name it. I mean come on what can Western literature teach us that we can't learn from old Indian and Chinese texts? But hell, the Indian man is so lazy he can't even go to his neighbourhood library to read them. He'll whine about everything but just won't work. He wants everything served on his plate like a toddler. Our historians are a perfect example!

From Deepak Fernandes

August 6, 2009 10:52 PM
You said "So many people in West still get India totally wrong" -- but that's true of indian perceptions of the West too. For instance, folks here will see thrashy Hollywood flicks and think that everyone in America is promiscuous (American boy), crazy, dumb and a bit bigoted, with no sense of family. While the reality can be quite opposite.

From Rahul

August 7, 2009 12:01 AM
Why Can't you Find a Good House For Yourself to Save Our Lives in India?

From Melissa A. Bell

August 7, 2009 5:06 AM
@Deepak Fernandes, you're totally right. It's not a bad thing we all have mixed up ideas of each other; we get all sorts of mixed messages from the media (sorry!). But if we allow ourselves the flexibility to change our opinions, to reinterpret people as they come to us, rather than assume we're automatically right, we'll be a much better society for it. It's good to hear you can see both sides of the coin here!

@Rahul, I have two very lovely houses, thank you. One in Delhi that I'm very much looking forward to getting back to soon.

@Simran I googled expat sexy thighs and I came up, but I'm being beat by "Young Sexy Lovely Chinese Expat". I'll have to work on getting further up the row. I am totally going to work on my tags more intently. Thanks!

From Jose

August 7, 2009 3:32 PM
Melissa, you are at typical example of ABCD or IBCA, i do not know into which category you belongs too. But am sure of one thing, you are a perfect example of an hypocrite. When you are in India, you say you are an American, and in the US (when it suits you) you or rather one of your sisters will announce that your from India. Hypocrite

From Shoba Narayan

August 7, 2009 8:58 PM
Jose: Melissa does live and work in India. I don't think he sister said she is Indian!

From Melissa A. Bell

August 8, 2009 4:23 AM
@Jose, Shoba's right. My sister only said I live in India, since I do. I, sadly, have absolutely no Indian ancestral ties, unless we go back really, really far to when our forefathers all sprung from some place in the heart of Africa. I think someone once dubbed me an ILCA--Indian Living Confused American. So there you have it.

From Borat

August 8, 2009 3:03 PM
Very Naaiice.I like you.

From Rahul

August 8, 2009 3:29 PM
Oh jeee what as mo/ron! Thats what I said dumbo, even you HAVE a house in Delhi, please don't return, that in turn will save our lives here in India or you really first want to be declared a persona non grata and then want us to do the hounours of throwing you out? We, by now, know you can't write, but now it seems you can't even READ? Gosh! What has this world come to?

From Rahul

August 8, 2009 3:31 PM
Jose is right, this person is the worst type of hypocrite I have seen anywhere - India or America, she never gets it though!

From Jose

August 11, 2009 12:53 PM
@Ms Bell: Hypocrite or not, but i am sorry if i sounded rude and insulting. Did not meant too, it is just my opinion. Further, i have see lots of journo (i am an equity journo) trying explicitly to mimic the American accent, when everyone knows that Americans speak English in the worst possible manner. It is only in India that we see people trying to mimic the American accent and feeling elitist with that moronic behavior. However, all said and one, there is one thing that i admire about you and that is your ability to laugh at yourself (eg ILCA). Though we may differ in our opinion, yet i always admire a person who can laugh at herself/himself :).

From Nitin Jain

August 11, 2009 2:14 PM
Well said and the narration is simply awesome. Property in Delhi, Real Estate in Delhi.

From jose

August 12, 2009 10:25 AM
Melissa, just one question though a very personal one. What made you leave your home, and come all the way to India. Which you do consider as quite dirty and underdeveloped compared with your hometown in the US of A - which is true too. Hoping to hear a honest reply instead of those jingoistic ones

From Melissa A. Bell

August 13, 2009 12:51 AM
@Jose Thanks so much! I'm happy to differ in opinions and glad you can still appreciate me. Feels good. I hope I don't come across accusing India as dirty and underdeveloped all the time. Just like to poke fun at the things I love. It is dirty in relation to some places, but there are a lot worse crimes than some dirt. And if you came from Southern California and the land of the suburban sprawl, you'd understand why I prefer underdeveloped places. Maybe I should write a blog post in answer to your question. Give me a day?

From Rahul

August 14, 2009 1:10 AM
So basically, Melissa, what you are saying is that you think that all Indian and inturn India is "dirty and underdeveloped", right? That's how I constructs your musings in your comment above! Kindly confirm my interpretations!

From Jose

August 14, 2009 10:47 AM
Rahul: Lets for once learn to call a spade a spade. We know and even you too will acknowledge that our country is comparatively dirtier than most American towns or cities. But, we do have some great things among all these dirt and grim, and off course our dark skins. That is loyalty and kindness especially the respect we have towards the elders. Where else but in India will you find a heavily pregnant women getting up in an over-crowded bus so that the elderly gentlemen can sit. Man, it happens only in India. But cleanness, pls don’t try to push that down my throat. We don’t not have any clean road in India (ugh, how can I ever say that our roads and cities are clean, it never was and never will be at least till the near future). And as for we Indians been clean, if we were, don’t you think our cities and town would have been clean too? Let me ask you one question. Where do we throw out those ciggie buds and gutka pouch? Anywhere, but the dustbin. No man, not even the highly educated ones use the dustbin like a normal gora, and it is true. While it is natural for any normal gori or gora to use the dustbin, and I have seen it with my own eyes. Once I was standing on platform number 3 at Churchgate station in Mumbai. The train was just arriving on to the platform and this gori was running here and there and most of us guys were amused to see her do so. But the amusement was short-lived, once we realised the reason behind her haphazard behavior. In fact most of us were too ashamed that we refused to look each other in the eyes. Reason, the gori was running here and there in search of a dustbin so that she could disposes of the used water-bottles that she was carrying around. Further, one day my father, who was a Station Master at Valsad Rly station, narrated this incidence. A gora family once came into his office asking my papa where the dustbin was, as he had a bag full of waste food. He could not find a single dustbin in the whole fuccking station. My papa said he felt as if he was skinned alive, he asked the potter on duty to take the waste-food material from the gora gentlemen and thanked him profoundly. To which the gora replied, why are you thanking me for? I would like to ask you, how many among us would have done that? Not even a single one, not even the highly educated. So let us be true to our faults, we are bit dirtier than most goras. But that does not make us inferior to them. No man, it does not because as I said earlier behind all this dirt and grim and dark skin, you will find that an average Indian is utterly loyal, helpful and extremely kindhearted. That is why, the whole nation laughed when recently a certain Chinese think-tank said that they can break up India on the basis of religion, caste and creed. Had that nitwit ever know what it meant to be an Indian, he would have come up with such a strategy. We Indians are, is and will always remain inherently loyal and big-hearted. That is why despite all the diversities, when the Mumbai blast occurred, when the earth quaked in Gujarat and when the terrorists attacked Mumbai, we stood together as one, Indian. It is only in India that terrorists like Ajmal Kasab can throw tantrum in the jail and get away with it. It is not because we are weak; it is because we are overtly kindhearted. And that is what makes you and me stand out among all those goras and goris ….. Our inherent Indian loyalty and kindheartedness. So, Rahul if you want to be proud of anything be proud of what you really are (loyal and kindhearted) and not what you are not (cleanliness). We are definitely not clean and neither are our towns and cities, I can vouch for that. I rest my case.

From Rahul

August 15, 2009 9:45 AM
Jose thanks for your reply! I, however, would like to hear from the writer an explanation for the above comment, failing which it will be deemed that comment is racist in nature and that she has the white man's superiority complex! You can be assured I'm not here to rest this case!

From RDX

August 15, 2009 10:54 AM
Alas..It seems sense of humour died untimely death in the blog sphere...

From Melissa A. Bell

August 15, 2009 9:58 PM
@Rdx, I share your fear.

@Jose, thank you for a great response. I'd like to let it stand as is, but per @Rahul's request:

India is not the cleanest place in the world. The roads, as Jose mentioned, are littered with trash, paan, occasionally backed up sewers. The roads in the US are not. I am NOT saying this is a sign that the US is better than India and cause for a great collective white 'We Are Superior' dance. But the roads are definitely cleaner here. One major reason for it? People who are arrested for drunk driving--people who drive after five or six glasses of alcohol are considered drunk by law--are made to do community service cleaning the sides of the roads here. It's pretty genius.

As for the underdeveloped part, well, I used that word because Jose did. I was using it literally: I grew up in California surrounded by wilderness. Now it's all suburban development and malls. I don't like that. But if we're talking semantics here, I do think a major prerequisite for a developed country would be to close the gap much, much more between the wealthy and the poor--at least in terms of a minimum quality of life: access to education, sanitation and food--than as it stands in India. Of course, by that rule, in the US the gap is sadly growing. I suppose you can say we're un-developing before the world's eyes. But you probably already knew that.

And Jose, blog post forthcoming in re: to your question.

From Andhrabhoja

August 16, 2009 10:57 PM
Let me get this!..you are probably fat (american standard) and cant get a guy in your homeland...but you still wanna feel special ...what do you do...you come to a great country like India which give great hospitality to guests..and then you crap all over the internet about it..why dont you signup for whos the biggest loser? you will surely win!! Please go back to you hillybilly occupied land..

From Jose

August 17, 2009 10:55 AM
Andhrabhoja: shame on you. Thats not the way you talk to a lady no matter what her opinion may be

From Andhrabhoja

August 18, 2009 5:42 AM
Melissa, a small advice,,why dont go back home if you dont like it.. whats up with this subtle negative publicity about India... "oh India is bad, but US is also bad..though not as bad as India"..we dont need your reviews,,,if your forefathers (read British) didnt steal all the money(read 10 trillion dollars)..you family probably would have starved...some audacity from someone who forefathers killed all native americans and destroyed a peaceful place called america.. And @ jose: what is this, buttering up to get a date with Melissa? go get a life

From aditya

August 18, 2009 8:31 PM
what kind of nickname is RDX! i shudder... please we have enough of terrorism in real life let that name R.I.P. please! @ Melissa: is that recommendation for Karma Cola from Moi? i do remember mentioning the book, but the book itself is a blank now for me(though i remember, in the crypts of my memory that i have an opinion that Gita's is better than William's book... sorry Delhirymple!) @ Jose/Andhrabhoja: a date or a fig, it's all dry fruit!

From jose

August 19, 2009 10:17 AM
Good thing i came back to this post, otherwise i could have missed out of such a great chance provided by Andhrabhoj. Man, you really opened a door for me to ask Melissa out. Further, i have never dated an American (read gori by your standard) before. Hey Melissa, what say, give me a call when you come to amchi Mumbai next time. Thanks Andhrabhoj for acting a cupid maker hahahhhhahahhehehehehehohohohohohoho

From Melissa A. Bell

August 20, 2009 1:02 AM
@Jose, we'll have to invite Andhrabhoja to our wedding to thank him for being our matchmaker.

@Aditya, yes! it was your recommendation and a good one. It's all just vignettes of life in India in the 70s. Really great stuff, though it does get, um, slightly repetitive toward the end. Been wondering where your puns were. Good to have you back.

From aditya

August 26, 2009 10:53 AM
@ Melissa i can't remember the book too well anymore... as for puns... no fun without pun! it's nice to be back - but i leave for Kandy soon.

From Sandip

September 8, 2009 5:21 PM
Great to see so many of my frog-in-the-well countrymen/women so active in blogosphere. Ever so lighted by the minutest of external criticism. We will crib about the country to death between ourselves, but nobody else is allowed to reveal/discuss it -- is that how it works? So people visiting the country are supposed to sing praises about it all the time to be eligible to stay here? With such an attitude, you don't see the irony of projecting the "greatness' of the country at the same time? Amusing.

From Michelle

September 13, 2009 8:08 AM
Oye! Can't we all just get along? Yes, most everyone my family and I came across in India was warm, helpful and friendly. Yes, the streets are dispicible. Yes, the streets of American are generally cleaner, with many less potholes. Yes, a huge percentage of Americans are grossly overweight. Is everyone happy? My husband, two kids (aka 'Harry Potter' and 'Baby') and I spent last November through March living in Gujarat and traveleing (mostly on 3rd class trains) throughout North and West India. We all have wonderful memories, but more importantly, all have wonderful friends that we cherish. Must there be a competition among the countries? I love both of them. Period. Now, back to the real topic of the original blog; Melissa, I took yoga classes all over India. No two classes or teachers were similar. Most yoga classes in India, even in the ashrams, left me wanting more physical work. However, I am now a master at pranayama! A few were just terrible, putting tourists into headstands during their first classes-telling them that using a wall was bad for the learning experience. When I returned to NYC I did a 200 hour yoga teacher training to straighten myself out. Anyway, what I really want to tell you is: Go to Agonda Beach and find Max. Best yoga instructor in India. Period. Hope to see you there this winter.

From Melissa A. Bell

September 14, 2009 10:08 PM
Michelle! Thank you so so much. I'm booking tickets asap. Love your comment. Start a yoga blog.

From george

September 20, 2009 1:44 PM
Michelle, I'm planning on being in Agonda in November - do you have any more info about 'Max'?

POST YOUR COMMENT

:
(required)
 
Email Address
(required)
   
(optional)
(HTML not allowed)